#24 - Imposter Syndrome: The Psychology Behind Why You Get It

Corey Wilks, Psy.D. (: 00:00

Leila Hormozi, Ali Abdaal, Lex Friedman, and Danny Miranda are all imposters. So are most of your favorite creators. And today, I'm gonna prove it. Let's get started. Impostor syndrome fundamentally is the belief that you don't belong in the room. Because when you have the audacity to put yourself and your ideas out there, it feels like you've crashed a masquerade ball. You're wearing your mask.

desperately hoping no one recognizes you weren't invited and don't belong. People clearly thinking you belong in the room with them keep coming up to you and talking to you like an equal and they want to know what you think about things. Surely you'll say something to tip them off. Your mask will fall off or any number of other pitfalls will clue them in to your fraud. You're just a peasant playing pretend with real royalty. It feels like a fever dream.

Like Alice, you've fallen down the rabbit hole and plopped right into a surreal world. And everyone is about to find out you're a fraud any minute because you don't belong in the room. Now there are many rooms you don't belong in, but today we're gonna talk about the two most common rooms you don't belong in. The first room you don't belong in. In front of you is a door that leads to a room full of people who inspire you. Your favorite writers.

entrepreneurs, creators, whoever. This room is full of people you've looked up to for years. There's no way you belong in this room because what have you done to inspire others? You bring down the average awesomeness of the room just by entering it. Please don't enter this room because you don't belong. If you enter it, you'll be an imposter, just like a few other people who've crashed the party. Here's what I mean. Danny Miranda is an imposter.

He's most known as a podcaster. Now Danny isn't a celebrity or a business mogul. He's not even in his 30s yet. Yet he had the audacity to start a podcast. For the longest time, he didn't even have a proper podcast studio set up. He just interviewed people through Zoom. Why would anyone give him the time of day to listen to his show, let alone agree to be a guest on it? Important people only want to talk to important people. And Danny just isn't important enough yet.

Corey Wilks, Psy.D. (: 02:21

Otherwise he'd have millions of followers and revenue, right? Since he doesn't, he clearly doesn't deserve important people's attention or time. It doesn't matter that he obsesses over being the best interviewer possible. It doesn't matter that he does an insane amount of research for every single episode. It doesn't matter that he deeply wants to give value to the world through having deep conversations with inspirational people all over the world. Some people might say,

He's attracting the very people who inspire him because inspirational people are attracted to inspirational people. And Danny is inspirational as fuck. But what do these people know? I mean, he's only had people like Alex Hormozi, Andy Frisella, Sam Parr, and Sahil Bloom on his podcast because he's so inspirational and dedicated to his craft. Come on, Danny. You don't belong in the room. Lex Friedman is an imposter. Lex Friedman hosts one of the most popular podcasts

today, but he's just a robotics and AI expert. He has no business entering a room filled with people who inspire him and are real thought leaders, but he's somehow amassed millions of subscribers. For his podcast where he explores his curiosity, connects through compassion, and tries to spread love, he should stay in the lab where he belongs.

No one cares what he thinks, especially when he strays from his area of expertise. He's just a research scientist for MIT. He has no business being a podcaster. Why would people ever want to give a robotics expert with a microphone the time of day? It doesn't matter that he has an incredible talent for deep analytical thinking. It doesn't matter that he genuinely wants to understand what it means to be human.

It doesn't matter that he has a profound humility and desire to connect that constantly makes people feel heard and psychologically safe. Some people might say world changers are attracted to authentic generosity, deep compassion, and genuine human connection, which is why Lex is the perfect person to do what he's doing. But what do these people know? He's only had some of the most influential people in the world like Elon Musk,

Corey Wilks, Psy.D. (: 04:36

Mark Zuckerberg, and Joe Rogan on his show to discuss deeply human topics that help us feel connected to each other and understand what it means to be human. Come on Lex, you don't belong in the room. Now let's say you heed my warning and you don't enter this room. Congratulations. No one wants you here because you don't belong, but there's a second room you also don't belong in. The second room you don't belong in. This other door leads to a room full of new territory for

You've never been here and have no idea what you're doing in this room. Everything is new and you're just bumbling through the crowd. You should leave and just stick to what you already know. Stay in your comfort zone. After all, being new to something also means you're going to suck at it for a while. Probably best if you just stick to what you're already good at. No point venturing into all this new territory. Otherwise, everyone will know you're a fraud. Just like these party crashers. Ali Abdaal is an imposter.

If only Ali would have listened before he decided to enter this room and write a book. Silly Ali, arrogant Ali, downright entitled Ali. Who is he to write a book? He's never written a book before. It's new territory for him. He should just stick to YouTube. How dare he write a book about productivity? He's only been studying productivity for years. He's only attracted an audience of a few million people interested in productivity.

He's only somehow used productivity principles to grow a business and a YouTube channel with millions of subscribers in revenue while also working through medical school and being a physician. Who was he to write this book? An imposter. That's who. He should just stick to what he already knows and never venture into new territory. It doesn't matter that he's passionate about helping people lead happier, healthier, and more fulfilling lives. It doesn't matter that he spent years learning everything he can.

experimenting and refining the best concepts related to productivity. And it doesn't matter that if he doesn't write this book, no one else has his specific insights, passion and trust with his audience. How dare he even try? Some people might say he's the perfect person to write a book on productivity because he's living proof of the transformative power feel-good productivity can have on your life. But what do they know? Come on, Ali.

Corey Wilks, Psy.D. (: 07:01

you don't belong in this room. Leila Hormozi is also an imposter. A couple of years ago, Leila Hormozi decided to start creating content on business topics. She never really created much content before, so this was new territory for her. She's talked before about how she isn't super feminine and her voice isn't high pitched, which people might expect from her content, and her personality isn't super agreeable. So she could put some people off. And I mean, she's a woman.

who wants to create content talking about business? Psh, nobody wants that. Everyone knows business content should only ever come from bros. It doesn't matter that she's the co-founder and CEO of Acquisition.com, a holding company that generates $85 million in yearly revenue across a variety of industries. It doesn't matter that she's founded and scaled companies to 120 million.

plus in cumulative sales across four different industries. It doesn't matter that she's passionate about advancing equal access to education and encouraging entrepreneurship in underprivileged communities. Because up until a few years ago, she'd never made content. She should just stick to running businesses instead of teaching others how to start, run, and scale a business. Some people might say Layla's the perfect person.

to talk about business because she isn't some vapid influencer who spouts motivational platitudes. But instead, she's someone who's genuinely passionate about making business skills accessible to people and deeply wants to inspire a generation of women and men to pursue entrepreneurship through lessons she's learned the hard way, building highly valuable and lucrative businesses. But what do they know? Come on, Layla, you don't belong in this room. Please, don't be like Ali or Layla. Don't enter this room.

They don't belong in it and neither do you. Unless, well, there's something I need to tell you. Here's a secret. If you enter either of these rooms, you will feel like an imposter. Danny's an imposter because he punches way above his weight class with the quality of guests he gets on his show. Lex is an imposter because he's just a research scientist who decided he wanted to explore what it means to be human through a long form podcast. Ali's an imposter because he's never written a book.

Corey Wilks, Psy.D. (: 09:21

Layla's an imposter because she's a woman kicking ass in business and inspiring a generation of entrepreneurs through her content. I'm an imposter because I grew up on food stamps. Prior to a few years ago, I had no business background and I just sit around thinking of ideas and sharing them on the internet. And for some reason, you've decided the ideas I share are worth your most precious resource, your time. But allow me to let you in on a little secret of this grand masquerade you found yourself in.

We're all imposters here. None of us know what the hell we're doing. We're all terrified and we're all winging it. Yet here we are, day in and day out, in these rooms where we feel like we don't belong. Because we've realized these are the only rooms where we can make the world a better place. These are the only rooms where we can explore our growth edges. These are the only rooms where we can reach our potential. We belong in this room and so do you. So join us.

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